Saturday, 24 December 2016

Santa

My daughters were  8 and 10 years old as Christmas approached. It was close to bedtime as we sat in front of the television watching the end of a Christmas movie. The youngest looked at me with eyes as wide as saucers.
"Is Santa real?" 

I looked at my 10 year old suspiciously, she stared at me intently. What had she told her little sister? My wife of course had kept up with the whole Santa, tooth-fairy, Easter Bunny thing but I was a pragmatist .......and so was my eldest daughter. Despite my wish for them to keep the sense of wonder and magic of childhood for as long as possible, I was adamant I wouldn't lie to them if they asked me outright.

My eldest never asked the same question, she didn't have to, when all said and done she would make her own mind up despite what anybody told her. On some things she had already come to her own conclusions and though discouraged from pushing her opinion on her sister, sometimes it would slip out.

The youngest had excitedly chattered away about Christmas since the decorations went up and the eldest had finally snapped.
"Don't be so stupid" she scoffed and they both looked at me, waiting for me to adjudicate, each confident of a response in their favour.

My kids had a habit of putting me on the spot, asking awkward questions at the most inopportune times. I had to tell the truth but in such a way the answer was acceptable to all. Unless you have kids of your own you will not understand how challenging that can be sometimes .....and this was one such time. I began as I do a ramble, and hoped my mind would steer a good course. This is what I told them.......

"A long, long, time ago, long before Benjamin Franklin discovered electricity, people celebrated different times of the year in different ways. The best time of year was the winter solstice in late December. It was a time of abundance, the harvest was in and the harsh months of winter were yet to bite. It was a time of feasting, building up reserves, like a bear does before hibernating. This was a special time of year. It was magical......"

I noticed the withered look my eldest gave me but ignored her.

"......magical because it seemed like people, for just this one time of year, were nice to each other. They would sit out the winter months grumbling about shortages, be busy as beavers in springtime planting crops, the toil took on a more relaxed nature in summer as they tended them. It was brief respite before the intense effort of harvest. Then with the harvest in, for a week at least, people were so happy and stress free. They were allowed to be themselves.

Unfortunately people became greedy, they wanted more than their fair share and fought each other. Instead of sharing the harvest for all, claim was laid to land, bullies forcibly taking control. The leaders with an army at their backs then took control of the harvest distribution, demanding for themselves and their sycophants more and more. Why should they go without during the harsh winter months, they are organising things - though you'll never see one out in the field with a sickle. And that is how we got governments.

Pretty soon there were rich people and poor people. The rich had control of the nation's resources and they kept more and more for themselves. Some rich people who inherited their wealth from their parents and didn't steal it from the poor themselves, saw this was wrong. They were more concerned about the poor people but their numbers were few.  These few helped keep alive the magical spirit of 'peace on Earth and goodwill to all', no matter how greedy many people had become. One such person was Odin."

My eldest looked at me puzzled.
"Odin?"
"Odin, Woden, Wotan, yes, that one. Odin was the first person whom we know was a Santa"
"I knew there was more than one" my youngest said triumphantly and the eldest rolled her eyes.

I carried on before they started arguing.

"There have been lots of Santa's but Odin is the first we know about for sure. You see Odin was one of these warlords, kings, land-owners, they go by many different titles. In days of old some people thought them capable of doing magical things, but mostly they were just very strong, or very clever. Anyway Odin although regarded as fierce, was bestowed with this feeling, this magic .....this spirit. Odin would lead his warriors on horseback in the seasonal Wild Hunt when game was as abundant as the harvest crops.

From a distance the eerie autumnal mist made these riders look like ghostly apparitions, racing across the horizon. Their horns and calls to get the game running would echo for miles, amplified by the fog. After the hunt Odin would share the spoils with the townsfolk. Where Odin lived they called this time of year Yule. It has many names and many celebrate it in different ways. Some called it Hanukkah, some Malkh, or Saturnalia, most people we know call it Christmas, but it is all the same thing.

The Wild Hunt

It was many years later, but still a long time ago when another man came along and his name was Nikolaos. Nikolaos was born in Myra to a Greek family. He had wealthy parents who died when he was young. Nikolaos was called the wonder-worker and later on Saint Nicholas because of the many things he did. As with everything people exaggerate, but in 311 AD during a famine, Nikolaos fed the whole town with wheat from a ship in the harbour sheltering from a storm.

The sailors were reluctant at first as the wheat had been weighed and it was bound for the emperor in Constantinople. It is told that Nikolaos promised no weight would be lost for whatever the sailors offloaded. When they reached Constantinople this was the case. Nikolaos may have paid for wheat without telling the townsfolk so they wouldn't feel beholden to him, the weight loss balanced in gold perhaps. This was the true Christmas spirit, just as it was with Odin and many unsung heroes in between. To the people of Myra it was a Christmas miracle and Saint Nicholas was responsible.

It was a miracle in a sense and one that we all make happen over and over again. Every time someone gives something with no thought of reward, or even acknowledgement, this spirit grows stronger and the miracles more frequent. It is up to all of us to keep this alive. It wasn't the only kindness Nikolaos did, there were many fantastic tales, some of which seem too incredible to be true, others aren't disputed.

A poor man had three daughters who would be sold into slavery if he didn't provide a dowry for them to marry. Nikolaos decided to help but again didn't want the recognition, so one night he threw three bags of gold into the house, one for each of the daughters. This is where things get muddled again. Some say he threw the bags down the chimney, others through an open window. Nobody knows but the account most people think of is that the daughters had hung their stockings by the fire to dry and in the morning they were filled with gold. They thought the money had come down the chimney but suspected it was Saint Nicholas or Santa Claus.


Santa Claus may have given us the traditions of hanging up stockings or expecting our gifts to come down the chimney, Odin may have given us the man with a white beard, the reindeer, the fir trees, and the Polar base, but the true spirit of Christmas, the looking out for each other, the being nice to each other, the magic of life itself, is within all those that choose to embrace it. Yes there is a Santa Claus, it's just that some people choose not to see it."

Thursday, 13 August 2015

Felines & Firemen

Firetruck



I remember hearing some strange stories about firemen but recollections were vague so I did a little research ........emphasis on 'a little'. A story I heard of was of a Fire Station burning down. There has been a surprising number. I dismissed the ones relating to arson because the firemen couldn't be responsible in any way. No good, only hopeless cases are allowed.....

We have to look to Germany of all places for supreme incompetence in the fire department (assume all puns are intended unless otherwise stated). This particular fire station (crew?) had history. The Syke Fire station in North Germany had burnt down in 1994 losing all six of its fire engines.

On January 11th 2009 the firemen of Syke had a training exercise. The station burnt to the ground a second time and fire-fighters from neighbouring cities were called in. It took nearly 250 firemen to extinguish the blaze, so large had it become. Due to the quick response of other fire stations only the vehicle bay and all of the fire fighting equipment was destroyed. The kitchen, offices, and lounges were saved.
"A fire service that can't even keep its own fire station and engines safe doesn't exactly inspire confidence" said one local.


The Lion King
One of my favourite stories comes from Italy and involves a lion. This story gives a whole new slant on lions and Christians in Italy. Lions are deemed the kings of the jungle but there was nothing regal about our lion. In 1970 a lion escaped from a circus in Italy. Inevitably the lion found a little boy and gave chase. Nothing wrong so far. The problem for our lion however was that the little boy's mother was on hand and attacked the unfortunate beast, badly mauling it in the process. The lion received severe head and skin injuries, and had to have treatment for shock!

So what is the connection between felines and firemen, I hear you ask.....

I remember as a kid we had three tv channels. One was ITV and they had their own news slot. ITN in their infinite wisdom decided at the end of every news broadcast they would use a little humour. They called this 'and finally....' Unfortunately some Brits lack a certain amount of humour when it comes to poor dumb animals.

My favourite 'and finally......' was perhaps the most least popular judging by the number of complaints received afterwards. Now, am I being cruel or was this genuinely funny?

During the firemen's strike of 1978 the British Army took over firefighting responsibilities. The bright red fire-trucks were replaced by the 'Green Goddesses' of the military. One of the first calls they received was on 14th January from an elderly lady whose cat was stuck up a tree.

The troops arrived in impressive time and effected the rescue without a problem. So impressed was the lady she made them all tea and biscuits. Fond farewells were bade and the Green Goddess promptly pulled away running over the cat and killing it.

Thursday, 23 July 2015

Stresses and Strains

The sky darkened overhead as the last traces of twilight scurried over the horizon. I sat in calm serenity gazing up into the endless infinity of space. A scattering of stars shone like quicksilver on a black velvet cushion. The crescent moon smiled at me, intensifying the feeling of a celestial benevolence. 

Somewhere in the distance the hoot of an owl disturbed the silent tranquillity.
'Concentrate!' I admonished for allowing myself to become distracted.


I strained hard, but to no avail.

Mother Nature would not be hurried by a mere mortal. As beads of sweat rolled down my forehead from sheer exertion, swift cumulonimbus clouds gathered overhead, devouring the starlight hungrily. The cheerful smile of the crescent Moon appeared more a grimace as it too became obscured by the ominous clouds.

The sky was illuminated with forked lightning and the accompanying clap of thunder gave me a start. Then a lesser but remarkably similar sound reverberated around the confined space. This sound was music to my ears, but quickly forgotten as the foul stench permeated the air and wafted uninvited up into my nostrils.

The relief at the sudden release of pressure was short lived as the sudden torrential downpour beat down on me. I looked towards the Heavens again, rain hitting my face almost painfully. I shook my head and made a mental note.
'I really must fix the roof on this outhouse'