Monday, 26 June 2017

DIY Prophecy Guide

Move over Nostradamus, I have decided to share my self-styled DIY Prophecy Guide. I actually shared it at Christmas but the post is much older and it's starting to get a bit spooky...

When predicting apocalyptic events we need to first decide what kind of disaster to send forth. Obviously it needs to be something big with huge cost to human life, what would be the point otherwise. Despite this I would recommend wannabe soothsayers start small, just to get the feel. To give you some idea I've listed below a few areas that can be explored.

  1. War - a bit old hat now and predicting one is pretty unremarkable. 
  2. Natural Disasters - these are always good to guess, particularly earthquakes and volcanic eruptions.
  3. Extra-terrestrial - meteors, solar flares, planet alignment, can all give clues
Of course there is no need to choose just one, a combination can be a clincher against doubters. Mix and match, it can be fun. For our example I am going to use a combination of Natural and Extra-terrestrial events but I'm going to keep it small - you only get one shot at predicting the end of the world. My advice to those who choose to go with the War format I would suggest looking at ethnic groups and disputed land. From there you can speculate who will side with who and predict something a little less obvious. The Middle East is a no-brainer, people have been killing each other there before they even knew about fossil fuels.

My guess would be Iran. The nuclear capability, the 'recent' revolution 1979, the wars with Iraq, and the fact the country is struggling between democracy and fundamentalism. At the moment the armed forces are controlled by religion rather than the puppet democratic 'government'. Alternately they may help Syria claim back ceded territory around the Sea of Galilee and Golan Heights. A weakened Iraq would no longer be a 'buffer' and suddenly the USA are in an awkward position as to whether they will back Israel, who certainly won't take things lying down. Especially now, as oil has been found in the Golan Heights.

The knock-on affect would be a Palestinian uprising during the crisis and the Plains of Megiddo could indeed trigger a war to end all wars. There are other places to look at, North Korea is an obvious one, yet I feel they are a long way off being a real threat to global security. Nope, if you want to predict war and unrest the Middle East is a pretty sure thing.

Natural disasters are another fail-safe area to predict. If you just look along the tectonic plate boundaries there are any number of places a disaster could occur. The most populous areas are best for obvious reasons but it's best to pick one that hasn't caused a problem for a while. New Zealand is in a unique location as the tectonic plate boundary has two different motions. In the South Island the plates rub alongside each other causing earthquakes, whereas in the North the Australian Plate subducts below the Pacific Plate which results in more volcanic activity.

After recent earthquakes in the South perhaps it indicates the North will spring to life again. The volcanoes are still very active. The most recent associated disaster was back in 1953 when a lahar took out a railway bridge at Tangiwai, and by consequence the Auckland to Wellington passenger train. Before that it was Mount Tarawera in 1886 which covered a village Pompeii style. These were devastating for New Zealand but had very little impact on the rest of the world. However Lake Taupo last exploded around 2,000 years ago and they heard the bang in China. The Romans too recorded associated phenomena from the time.

Italy is another possibility for volcanic conflagration as the African Plate collides with the European. Etna and Stromboli are constantly active which releases the pressure sufficiently to suggest a big one unlikely. What about another Vesuvius eruption though, the volcano is still active and a similar event to 79 AD could see Naples become the new Pompeii / Herculaneum. In 1631 an explosive eruption killed 4,000 people. The list of possible disaster sites are endless and you don't even have to guess. There is an even safer bet.


Sea-levels are set to continue rising so predicting major flooding is perhaps too obvious. However with a little lateral thinking you can stay one step ahead with your prophecies. Consider the tipping point, that point of no return when a bottle for example has been gently pushed over until it gains momentum and accelerates. The idea being that although the disappearance of the polar caps has been a relatively gradual process (in human timescale not geological), the end will happen very quickly indeed. I conservatively guess in another 40 years, experts say 100 or more. Timing can be crucial when predicting future events so we must use ambiguity without seeming to do so.

Monarchs are good for this. If we look at the current Royal family we can make a few more guesses. In 40 years the Queen and Prince Charles will probably have popped their clogs and William if still alive would be 73 years old. Giving the experts more credit than they deserve, let's say the total meltdown will occur after my estimate. This would mean there is a good chance Prince William's first-born will be on the throne as George VII. Then you have your time span "During the reign of George VII great floods...." and also some flexibility depending if and how long Georgie reigns for. 

Look for other clues that others may not have spotted, or that are not common knowledge. Most people know about the Canary Islands and the imminent possibility of a land-slide that could dump half a mountain into the Atlantic. The resulting 'mega-tsunami' would devastate the east coast of America. Something that is less well known however is what is going on in Greenland. It's not so much not knowing what is happening, as not fully understanding the implications.

Greenland has the second largest body of ice in the world and it is melting. Yeah big deal we knew that. If it was to melt completely sea-levels would rise 7.2 metres (24 foot). Knew that as well, sort of. The thing that is usually overlooked is something quite different. The inland area of Greenland is uniformly flat except for the middle which is depressed by the weight of ice. If this ice is no longer there then isostasy occurs as the gravitational equilibrium between crust and mantle is restored.

I imagine this too will be a gradual process up until a point is reached where the land may just 'pop-up' for the last shove. Anything could happen but I would guess a mega-tsunami is likely. Dismissing all these and countless other scenarios from around the world. I have chosen California. The area is subject to high volumes of earthquakes due to the San Andreas Fault. As with most earthquakes two plates become jammed together and pressure builds. Eventually something gives and the sudden jerk reaction on release causes a quake.

In the mid to late 1800's the buildup and periodic release of seismic pressure along the northern San Andreas fault produced a series of magnitude 6.0 or greater on the Richter scale earthquakes, leading up to the famous 1906 San Francisco 7.8 earthquake. Apparently this pressure build-up is happening again. Okay it's going to happen, but how do we determine* when?

*guess

Historically the seven largest quakes recorded are these:-
  1. Jan 9th 1857 - 7.9 hit Fort Tejon one person died 
  2. Feb 24th 1892 - 7.8 hit near Baja no reported deaths
  3. Apr 18th 1906 - 7.8 hit San Francisco causing an estimated 3,000 deaths
  4. Mar 26th 1872 - 7.4 hit Owen's Valley 27 reported deaths
  5. Jan 31st 1922 - 7.3 hit west of Eureka no deaths
  6. Jul 21st 1952 - 7,3 hit Kern County 12 died
  7. Jun 28th 1992 - 7.3 hit Landers 3 died more than 400 injured
Now we could cheat here, but if we are trying to con gullible people into believing the crap we write, let's at least give a little value for money. The cheat would be to look at the dates, automatically the number 2 jumps out at you. Perhaps 2022 would be a good, bad omen. Anyway unlike others we won't cheat, we will instead look to the stars for help ......well one star and a few planets.

May 2000 was another date given as a possible world-ender and this was based on planetary alignment. All the planets were the other side of the Sun to us and all sorts of crazy theories sprang up. In my opinion it did have some affect though. I believe the Moon, the planets and the Sun can all affect tectonic activity here on Earth. Of course there is no evidence to support this ........yawn. So when will this occur again? Not until May 6th 2492 I'm afraid. How about predicting that as the new end of the world for that very reason? Just think in 476 years someone from the future might find this and start worrying. Nah, could never happen.

There is another date in 2040 where the innermost planets (discounting ourselves) will all be in the same part of the sky, but that again is a little too far ahead for our purposes here. Solar Maxima are handy because they seem to encourage seismic activity..... although there is no evidence to support this. The recent solar maximum was of course in 2012, a pattern suggests the most likely date for the next maximum will be around 2022-24, but we won't know until this one ends. The average solar cycle is about 11 years but can fluctuate between 9 and 12 years, Once again though that 2022 number comes up. A sign of the times?

I've had a vision! Yeah before you go all hypocritical on me read this.....

vision
noun
  1. 1.
    the faculty or state of being able to see.
  2. 2the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination or wisdom.



I could write the summary Nostradamus style, little poetic quattrain, or I could write it scripture style as some kind of revelation, maybe I should claim alien abduction because I'm obviously not of this planet. As there are no longer witch-hunters today I needn't hide my beliefs with metaphor, I mean who would kill another person for their beliefs in this day and age ......ridiculous. So here it is.


Late in 2022 an earthquake measuring 7.9 on the Richter scale will hit San Francisco, it will cause widespread damage and will be preceded by a series of smaller quakes. One of San Francisco's famous landmarks will be destroyed.

Sunday, 25 June 2017

Perception 3.1

Before looking at how perceptions were formulated in others, I think it only fair I use myself as an example. Having searched for a plausible solution to the enigma of human origins for several decades, I may not in establishment terms be deemed an expert but I feel it at least qualifies me to give a reasonably informed opinion. So this is how I see it.....

For some reason we are of the opinion that life is pretty rare, maybe non-existent outside of our own little planet. To believe this is incredibly short-sighted or extremely arrogant. Life is just a series of chemical reactions producing energy, energy is life. It is going on all over the universe, at all different levels. If the universe was 'created' it wouldn't have been done so to specifically produce mankind.

Evolution may have been responsible for life on this planet but something just doesn't add up. The transition from Neanderthal to Modern Man is too severe. Scientists have been looking for the missing link for as long as I can remember, but there isn't one. With there being no signs of genocide found on Neanderthals it only leaves two options. They mysteriously died out maybe by some disease Modern Man was immune to, is one tenuous possibility, but I think they simply integrated.

I read quite recently scientists found some Neanderthal DNA in our species but cannot remember exactly the details. It just reinforced the view I've always held. The answer to the question of why we aren't more like Neanderthals if they are our ancestors, is due to neoteny. Evolution is merely adaptation. Our genes were just stronger than those of Neanderthals. Our comparative 'child-like' appearance is a by-product. An alternate argument is that Neanderthals evolved into modern man after the ice-age to adapt to the warmer climes.

The problem with that is the ice-age only finished 10,000 years ago and Neanderthals seemed to vanish 30,000 years ago. The biggest problem with the believe we evolved from Neanderthals is with brain structure. From a brain geared up to sight, sound and instinct, we were suddenly bestowed with an analytical brain, separating us from the rest of the animal kingdom. There is only one way this can be explained...... a creator.

Now before you religious folk go all cock-a-whoop with the 'I told you so's', it's not exactly the creator you have in mind. It's certainly not any creator of the universe. I doubt even we were created, we were adapted. It is safe to assume there is life outside our solar system, it's also safe to assume that since our star is merely middle-aged there will be life at a more advanced stage than our own. The crux of the matter is whether any life visited us.

When you look at gaping holes in scientific knowledge and the plethora of religions, myths, and UFO stories, it almost a certainty we have been visited. Some would question why an advanced species would visit us, just ask NASA and SETI why they're exploring space. It could be they thought they were doing us a favour interfering with our evolutionary process, genetically modifying Neanderthals (giving us fire and fruit from the Tree of Knowledge).

The adverse affects of their interference now leaves them with a moral dilemma. Interfere again and perhaps make a bad situation worse or leave us to our own devices and hope we can sort it out ourselves. Maybe they just left after they saw what self-destructive savages we are. Who knows? The point is, whether you want to call them Gods or just interstellar busy-bodies, their existence is certain.

Perhaps they interacted with us, maybe they still do to a lesser degree, but far from us praying for their forgiveness, I think they should be issuing us with a massive apology.

Okay so that is a synopsis of my overall perception, some will agree with it in part, some will disagree completely, and no doubt a few will want to kill me, but that is just my opinion. The real issue is how I formulated that opinion and that began at a very early age.

I came from a mixed family. My mother was Catholic and my father atheist. My father didn't really express views on religion, he didn't care one way or the other so wasn't put out when I was baptised or went to a Catholic primary school. By then I was already a fan of Santa so welcomed this God person into my life. I became an altar boy and had a healthy respect for the church. The priests were beyond reproach although one or two nuns who taught us were sadists.

By the time I was losing my teeth I had sort of latched on to the Tooth-Fairy being fake but went along with it for the cash (I was even known to become a little impatient and prise one or two stubborn teeth out). The news Santa wasn't real was a huge body blow (don't worry kids I found out later he was Santa) and it was shortly before I went to 'big school'. This made me question things and sparked my research.

Initially I dismissed the Bible as total twaddle. Things were just too incredible to be true. Santa visiting all the children in one night, a flood that covered the whole planet, parting the Red Sea, resurrecting people, complete bollocks! However, I wanted to be objective and I needed to look into things more before dismissing them. My research took me in many directions and something weird started to happen. The impossibilities not only became possibilities but probabilities.

One thing I noticed early on was the problem in looking at ancient events with a modern perception. It simply doesn't work, yet it is on this basis the vast majority of people formulate their opinions. This is how things get twisted and how evil people with an agenda manipulate those unable to think for themselves.

Saturday, 24 June 2017

Perception 3.0

Once you catch someone out in a lie, it is very difficult to believe anything else they say. Some things you know to be false aren't always a matter of deception, sometimes it is merely a flawed perception. Life is certainly strange enough for incredible things to happen but it is foolish to blindly believe everything people tell you.

From Inception and Deception we can pretty much be certain that Moses came up with the idea of monotheism. Whether he did in fact see God, E.T., or just had too much singing syrup is moot. Instead of arguing what can or cannot be proven, let's look at motive. Hammurabi introduced a code of laws in Mesopotamia - the ancestral home of Abraham's people - during his reign (1792-50 BC) which was around the time Joseph flourished in Egypt. Was Joseph and ergo his descendants, aware of Hammurabi's code of laws and was this what inspired the 10 Commandments. Of his intent with the code of laws Hammurabi states they were "to make justice visible in the land, to destroy the wicked person and the evil-doer, that the strong might not injure the weak". Leading a multitude through a desert for 4 years (yes 4, not 40) would not be without its challenges. Rules needed to be made but enforcement could be tricky.

You would think Moses could pretty much write his own ticket after the escape from Egypt, especially with the tsunami decimating the pursuing army. Unfortunately for him things weren't so simple. A lack of water made many of his followers regret leaving Egypt. Even when they found an oasis they had to battle a nomadic tribe (Amalekites) who frequented the area. Curiously a biblical account states Moses was worried his people would stone him to death if he didn't find water. Seems bloody ungrateful to me and it may have prompted the 10 Commandments (there were actually over 100 but most accounts just list the Top 10). The people clearly needed to be kept under control, if only for his own safety.

The Commandments themselves are very reasonable, basically they just say 'be nice to each other'. Taking that into consideration, what happened next seemed a little hypocritical. Moses sent spies into Canaan although the purpose is unclear. The Israelites had been absent from Canaan for a couple of centuries, if they thought the Canaanites - with whom they had failed to integrate before - were going to welcome them back with open arms they were mistaken. Not only that, given their previous position, the Israelites would expect to rule. After the death of Moses, Joshua led an army and rampaged through the land of Canaan.

Joshua led the destruction of Jericho, then moved on to Ai, a small neighboring city to the west. This time he was defeated and withdrew with thirty-six Israelite deaths. The defeat was attributed to Achan taking an 'accursed thing' from Jericho, resulting in Achan and his family and animals being stoned to death to restore God's favour. Joshua then went on to defeat Ai. The Israelites countrolled much of the land and divided it up amongst themselves. To further exacerbate the situation, the Israelites once again failed to integrate with the defeated Canaanites. Joshua stated the Israelites should 'have no fellowship with the native population, because it could lead them to be unfaithful to God'.

Fast forward 3,000 years and this war still simmers, frequently boiling over. The point to all this is perception. On an initial analysis it is pretty damning evidence that the Israelites were clearly the bad guys. Not just once either. Abraham first took his people to Canaan where he declared they would settle. It caused a few problems but they were quickly remedied when famine hit. Abraham then abandoned Canaan and moved on to Egypt.

On his return he ousted the weakened and over-extended Elamites and one might say earned the right to rule over Canaan. However, Abraham's great grandson Joseph found himself in Egypt and soon after the rest of the clan moved there. Many talk of Moses leading the children of Israel from slavery back to the promised land but it doesn't look that way to me. Abraham's descendants chose to go to Egypt and for a second time abandoned Canaan. They only became slaves when things soured a few hundred years down the line. I fail to see how they could still lay claim to the land of Canaan, and no doubt so too did the Canaanites.

Things are slightly more complicated. The Israelites were actually Sumerians and they were forced to leave their own land due to the Elamite invasion. The problem was that once the Elamites were forced back to their own territory (modern day Iran), the Sumerian refugees didn't return to their homeland. This is a problem that has persisted throughout time. History shows us many countries infiltrated by colonists or conquerors. A plethora of nations and creeds have fought for world domination. It needs to stop but how do you draw a line in the sand. At what point is the cut off.

Take New Zealand as an example. The Maoris will - with some justification - claim the white man stole their land. What is not quite so well known is the fact the Maoris weren't the first to colonise New Zealand, a tribe called the Mori Ori were and the Maoris pretty much ate them all. It seems hypocritical to say "give me back the land I stole". To a lesser degree, similar could be said about America. Once again the white man colonised land already settled by indigenous peoples, and mostly through war. I do wonder though how many indigenous tribes fought each other with a view to seizing territory.

These problems can never really be resolved until greed is eliminated. When greed and self-interest makes way for empathy and selflessness, it won't matter where the lines on a map are drawn. People need to change their perception on the true meaning of life.

God v. Devil: Technology

If what we read is true, God(s) clearly didn't want us to have technology. Adam and Eve - Fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, Prometheus - Fire, are stories that categorically state mankind should under no circumstances be given knowledge (technology). On that basis, the use of any technology is a massive sin. You can't have your cake and eat it.

It's true that technology will cause our demise rather than be a salvation. Scientists dream of colonising other planets, why? I'm not sure we should look to extend ourselves beyond this planet. Everybody has to die some time and given our record to date we are hardly worth saving. I think it's about time people started getting along and enjoying the fleeting gift of life.

Friday, 23 June 2017

Toilet Humour

I don't know if you are like me but I only like to have a dump in my own toilet. When there is no other choice though, I brave the public inconveniences. However there is a protocol to be followed. For instance, if there are a line of cubicles I look to see which are 'engaged' and from the results make my selection. I am always careful to ensure I get a cubicle with those either side vacant. This saves embarrassment should there be a splash or 'thunderclap'.

If I am fortunate enough to choose a time when all the cubicles are empty I will select one in the middle (providing there are more than four). This allows the next poor unfortunate the benefit to select a cubicle away from mine. So am I weird or do others use this method? One day my theory they did was shot to pieces.


I had selected the middle cubicle of nine, having checked for fall-out from the last occupant first, and sat tentatively. The tortoise had just began to poke his head out when it happened!


Somebody else came in to use the facilities and I froze. Shouldn't be a problem, he will pick a trap near the end and I can continue. The newcomer chose the cubicle NEXT to mine. I was horrified but how could I protest to this faceless stranger. The tortoise was getting impatient and I tried to ease it out hoping it would slide gracefully into the water. Not so!




My horror turned to disbelief when a voice came from the next cubicle.

"Alright mate?"

Who the hell talks to a stranger while taking a dump? Was he insane?

"Alright" I responded cautiously, I mean I had to be polite after all.
"How are you?" the voice asked.

Now I was aghast. A simple greeting to save my embarrassment at making a splash was almost commendable, if a little weird.

"Fine thanks"
"How's the wife and kids?"

I thought of possible answers as to why this strange conversation was taking place and wondered if he had seen me enter the building and knew me. The voice wasn't familiar.

"They're fine" I replied, trying to give myself more time to think.
"Going on holiday this year?"
"Hadn't planned on it" I said, finding myself becoming drawn into the conversation.

A loud irate banging on the thin wall of the cubicle made me crap myself.... metaphorically speaking. I mean technically I had alre-, well you know what I mean. The voice that followed was louder and quite angry.

"Will you shut up! I'm on my phone"

Deception 2.4

Perhaps the biggest problem with migration is a failure to integrate. Abraham and his Sumerian clan didn't integrate with the Canaanites and once the Elamite invasion had become a distant memory, this lack of interbreeding was a source of division. It didn't help that Abraham and clan, having delivered the Canaanites from the Elamites thought themselves superior culturally. It was similar in Egypt but the boot was on the other foot.

Joseph and his brothers were put in charge of livestock as their experience was above that of the Egyptians at the time. They flourished and became very wealthy but they didn't mix with the Egyptians and became a culture within a culture. For generations the descendants of Abraham became more powerful and their numbers swelled. Times change though and so do Pharaohs. Historical accounts tell us Canaanites first appeared in Egypt towards the end of the 12th Dynasty (1800 BC), and by 1720 BC had established an independent realm in the eastern Nile Delta. Whether these were references to Abraham's descendants is unclear but their power began to wane during the 13th and 14th Dynasties, most likely due to famine and plague.

In about 1650 BC, both dynasties were invaded by the Hyksos, who formed the Fifteenth Dynasty. The Hyksos were rulers from foreign lands and their arrival coincided with the Santorini eruption, suggesting these rulers were of Aegean origin. The penultimate ruler of the Hyksos dynasty was Apepi / Apophis / Epaphus, son of Io who fled Mycenae for Egypt (see Redefining Atlantis). The Pharaoh Ahmose waged war against the Hyksos and expelled Khamudi, their last king, from Egypt around 1550 BC*.

With the departure of the Hyksos kings, the influence of Abraham's descendants dropped like a stone. They were many in number and successive Pharaohs saw them as a threat, in a short space of time they became mere slaves. One Pharaoh (I believe it to be Thutmose I) ordered the death of newborn boys from the 'Canaanite' population in order to keep their numbers down. there are conflicting dates for Thutmose I's reign with some sources giving it as 1526-13 BC, whilst others give 1506-1493 BC. Either would fit in as being around the time of the birth of Moses.

The story of how Moses was saved and grew up within the Egyptian royal household, is well documented so I see little point going over it here. Moses becomes an interest some 50 years later.

When talking of 'deception' there is an obvious negative connotation but it doesn't necessarily mean the perpetrator has ill-will. In the case of Moses there is no doubt he acted to save his people from slavery but there is also no doubt he pulled off the biggest and best deception of them all. To be fair, he was assisted in no small part by Mother Nature.

Now I'm not interested in the Burning Bush, 10 Commandments, and all that. My interest is in cold hard facts. Whether Moses had any interaction with a deity or possibly extra-terrestrial is really no concern. It is the interaction between Moses and the Pharaoh that intrigues me. The eruption of Santorini in 1650 BC paved the way for the Hyksos kings and now it would set the children of Israel free.

Archaeological evidence on Crete (halfway between Santorini and Egypt) tells us there was a tsunami in 1450 BC and 30 years ago this was the date given for the Santorini eruption. However, in the last 10 years or so this date seems to be revised to 1650 BC and 1450 BC has seemingly been forgotten. What prompted this revision is unknown to me but having to take the word of experts, I needed to find an explanation. The thing that eventually came to me was as a result of studying other volcanoes and their behaviour.

In the absence of an eruption it is my belief the 1450 BC event was a cone collapse triggered by an earthquake. The magma ebbed back after the 1650 BC eruption leaving Santorini (Atlantis) sitting on top of a hollow chamber. It may not even have needed an earthquake to cause the collapse, it may just have been a matter of time i.e. 200 years. This event in the Aegean was crucial to what was going on in Egypt. It was instrumental in the 10 plagues legend and Moses took full advantage. Incidentally, Rabbinical Judaism calculated a lifespan of Moses corresponding to 1391–1271 BC; Jerome gives 1592 BC, and James Ussher 1571 BC as his birth year. They're all wrong, his date of birth was between 1520 and 1505 BC.

Moses convinced the Pharaoh that the series of disasters were attributable to the wrath of his God. If we analyse the story, the Pharaoh wasn't fooled immediately but the persistence of Moses and the seemingly endless number of disasters eventually convinced him..... or did it? Apparently the Pharaoh allowed the children of Israel to leave then changed his mind. I think it just as likely he never assented at all and pursued the Israelites when they made off during the confusion.

The Ten Plagues

1. Water Into Blood - This is actually quite a common phenomenon and the picture shows how dramatic the effect can be. The picture is actually of the Yangtze River but similar has been observed on the Nile. The Santorini eruption was probably not guilty in this case though. The phenomenon is most commonly observed when water levels are low like in times of drought.

2. Frogs - The cause of the rivers turning red is due to algae and this may well have caused a freak number of frogs to spawn with a food source in plentiful supply. This is again a by-product of drought and not due to Santorini.

3. Lice - As livestock died flies, gnats, and lice would also be on the increase.


4. Mixture of Wild Animals - This particular 'plague' has been the subject of much speculation but like much else, the exact nature of this plague is not a matter of great importance. Some say it brought carnivores to the land, scavengers perhaps. Another line of thought is the 'wild animals' were snakes, scorpions, and reptiles (the Nile crocodile is the second largest in the world).

5. Diseased Livestock - Drought and famine induced no doubt, still not impressed.

6. Boils - Even at this point there is nothing to suggest divine intervention and everything happens in a natural progression, triggered by the initial drought.

7. Thunder and Hailstorms - This is a phenomenon commonly associated with volcanic eruptions but there is no definitive time-span for these plagues so although it could be due to Santorini, it doesn't necessarily have to be.

8. Locusts - Although Egypt was having a pretty torrid time of it, so too were all the eastern Mediterranean peoples. A plague of locusts is still not rare enough to be considered the wrath of God.

9. Darkness for 3 Days - This is directly associated with volcanic eruptions and can have no other explanation. The volcanic ash from an eruption or even dust plumes from a cone collapse would darken the skies as it passed over Egypt.

10. Death of Firstborn - This seems pretty selective and of all the plagues it is the one I would question on the literal meaning. The associated volcanic ash / dust would possibly be enough to kill infants if it found its way into their lungs but would not harm an older child or adult. Was the plague referring to 'newborn' rather than 'first-born'?

The flight from Egypt was another piece of good-timing. The parting of the Red Sea was - as is now widely accepted - a reference to the Reed Sea or Sea of Reeds. This is an area of marsh on the north coast of Egypt. The waters parting were actually the sea withdrawing as it commonly does with a tsunami. This would have made the marsh passable on foot. The Egyptians saw the Israelites escaping and gave chase when the wave of the tsunami struck.

With such an amazing run of luck, perhaps it was divine intervention....... nah, Moses just got lucky, and big style.

*In Mycenae a gold face mask was unearthed and wrongly named the Mask of Agamemnon. This mask was actually the Mask of Epaphus (Apophis). It is dated to 1550 BC (Agamemnon didn't appear until 300 years later) the time the Hyksos left Egypt. The body of Epaphus was returned to his native Mycenae for burial. I cannot verify this of course but one day the historians will stop scratching their heads and finally work it out. I told them where Atlantis was 30 years ago and only now are they starting to acknowledge I was right.

Thursday, 22 June 2017

It's A Snip

Circumvent Circumcision

I'm pretty much against circumcision, particularly for western civilisation. I mean, who in their right mind would cut a bit of your child's penis off before the poor kid even knows how big it's going to be. It is my belief the practise was founded in the Middle East and was used as a method of preventing disease. If you take countries where water is at a premium and bathing difficult, it is easy to see how yeast infections and other hygiene related problems can occur. It was probably given a religious connotation later on to make it more generally adhered to.

The USA has the largest percentage for non-religious circumcisions at around 85% and it's big business. In depth studies show it is actually harmful and is more likely to cause infections than prevent them. Anyway don't take my word for it, I hired a couple of experts......

"I went to be castrated yesterday"


"Wow, harsh! I'm getting circumcised because I heard it makes sex better"

"THAT was the word I was trying to think of"

Later that day at the doctor's surgery..........

"Take your clothes off please"

"Now what?"

'Bzzzzzzzzzzzz'

"Aaaaargh!!!"

After recovering a little I asked the doctor what he did with the foreskins he removed. He told me they were incinerated so I asked if I could have some as I knew a guy who worked with leather. I thought he could make me a novelty item. 

A week later there had been a run on circumcisions and the doctor told me to come and pick them up. There was a sackful. It was a bit more than expected but I took them anyway. When I gave them to my leather-working friend he told me to come back in a couple of days. It was with a certain amount of excitement I went back to see what he had produced with all those little pieces of skin.


"A wallet?! Is that all, I gave you loads"

"Rub it"



"Wow!"

Wednesday, 21 June 2017

Deception 2.3

Taking Abraham's death to be around 1925 BC (I have reservations about longevity given in biblical accounts), the Near and Middle East was in turmoil. Egypt was perhaps the most stable place to be and it was also a good place to look when dating people and events. Fortunately - for our purposes - the family of Abraham would soon return there.

The Aegean migrations were taking place and by the middle of the second millennium BC agriculture was coming of age. The ancients knew all about the seasonal cycles prior to then but had little knowledge on the effects of nutrient depletion by constantly planting the same crops in the same areas. Every 5-7 years this deficiency would cause crops to fail, and that is even without a drought, plague of locusts, etc. When crops failed, problems began.

Egypt was probably less vulnerable with the Nile providing a natural irrigation and sufficient nutrients. The land of Abraham and the Canaanites however were constantly struck by these crop failures. With Abraham and Lot out of the way, Isaac was left to govern. Isaac was a much more relaxed type than his father and he had no desire to use the influence of his father to control the Canaanites. This coupled with the segregation of living outside the cities ate away at the influence Abraham and his clan held in the region.

Isaac had two sons, rough-and-ready Esau and quiet and thoughtful Jacob. They were twins but Esau was born first and favoured by Isaac. Many years pass until Isaac is old and blind. In the tradition of the time he was due to give his birthright to his eldest son Esau but became victim of a deception perpetrated by his wife Rebecca and youngest son Jacob. The biblical account details quite thoroughly how this was done, but it is not really relevant here save for the fact it gives a clear indication of how untrustworthy these people were.

If that wasn't enough, things didn't improve with Jacob either. He had 13 sons by 4 different wives. The penultimate son when youngest was Joseph and he wasn't a nice kid. When I say 'not nice', he wasn't exactly bad, just cocky and devious. Today he would perhaps be described as a spoilt brat. Joseph was his father's favourite and spy, he used to tell tales on his brothers which did nothing to endear him to them. It got to the point where they decided to kill him. A change of mind led to him being sold as a slave to passing merchants on their way to Egypt. The brothers told Isaac wild animals had killed Joseph.

The story of Joseph and his technicoloured dream-coat is well documented and I'm not about to dissect it here. The rape accusation, the dream divination, the drought in Canaan and the re-union of Joseph and his brothers. Long story short, Abraham's clan ended up back in Egypt and once again it proved to be lucrative. My only real interest in them was to establish a timeline link to Moses. This 'study' is a spin-off from Redefining Atlantis and there are strong enough links to be able to tie together timelines of people and events.  It also has to be remembered there is no indication of monotheism before Moses.

Although there is no direct link from Abraham to Moses, there is one to Joshua, allegedly Moses' right-hand man. Below is a list with approximate dates, the 'circa' dates are for the year of birth only:
  • Abraham 2020-1925 
  • Isaac 1950-1870
  • Jacob 1900-1805
  • Joseph 1825-1734
  • Ephraim 1763-1701
  • Beriah  c.1733
  • Tahan c.1702
  • Telah  c.1655
  • Laadan  c.1610
  • Ammihud  c.1590
  • Elishama  c.1570
  • Nun c.1545    
  • Joshua c.1500
The first Santorini eruption was around 1650 BC and some 'scholars' indicate this as the time of Moses but the event of 1450 BC (verified by archaeology on Crete) appears to be more from cone-collapse than another eruption (see Redefining Atlantis). It was this later event that gave rise to the legend of the 10 plagues and the Exodus from Egypt.

Trick-Cyclist

Okay this is a little incident that occurred when I was nineteen years old and working on a cruise ship. Our next port of call was San Francisco and the powers that be, in their infinite wisdom, decided it would be in the interests of science (and Health & Safety) for me to visit a trick-cyclist. At least that's what I thought the Captain said when I accepted the offer.

The 'trick-cyclist' turned out to be one of these head doctors. I didn't care, half an hour of laying on a couch pouring out my woes to a foreign stranger was no biggie. Just like a trip to the corner shop at home really. The icing on the cake was, once cured of the manic depression my brain had yet to pick up on, I could go on a binge in the hippie capital of the world.

However, as with the rest of my life in general, things were not quite so straightforward. This is roughly what transpired and may God strike me down if I lie (come on, you don't answer my prayers don't take me literally now).

I opened the door to the psychiatrist's office and immediately felt ill at ease. For one thing, the guy looked at me like I was a nutter or something. He was big, REALLY big - he was actually fat but I'm learning this new PC thing, haven't quite got the hang of it yet. His bulk was matched by the size of his leather-bound swivel chair and massive desk he sat behind. In stark contrast was the small wooden chair he motioned to.





What happened to the 'lie down and tell me your troubles' then?


I sat perched on the small chair feeling like a Borrower when the guy pulled out a set of cards. They just looked like ink-blots to me. I was puzzled.


If I'm honest they reminded me of getting smacked round the back of the head by a Geography teacher for knocking over a bottle of ink, but I couldn't see the relevance.


I wasn't sure he was quite ready for that but if I was going to get drunk today I needed to humour the person. I took a look at the first picture.....
"A guy with a huge penis"

He handed me another.....
"A couple about to have sex"

Another.....
"Wow, a threesome"



The guy passed me one more card.....
"Conjoined twins..... masturbating"


I was fast losing patience and pointed out to the psychiatrist it was he who was showing me the porn. He gave me a strange look but put the cards away.


I wish I knew what he was thinking



We seemed to have reached an impasse and sat in silence.  You could cut the atmosphere with a knife....



Only when I got caught


Yes

He looked at me sympathetically, I could sense another question coming,

I do it all the time



Touch myself inappropriately


Hmm







I'm hungry. Seriously, you get paid for this?

The guy seemed to be agitated and I could see the veins on his neck trying to burst through the skin.

He pulled out these kiddie blocks and told me to fit them in the correct holes. Really? I mean a joke is a joke but now he was asking for trouble.


I put the triangle into the triangle hole then took up the square and tried to fit it through the circle hole. Naturally it wouldn't fit so I 'encouraged' it. Actually I smashed it as hard as I could with my fist. Splintered wood and brightly coloured plastic shapes flew everywhere.

Square peg round hole. Isn't that why I'm here?

He scribbled something on a piece of paper and put it in a plain brown envelope for me to give to the captain. I had expected psychiatrists themselves to be mentally stable but this guy looked about to have a breakdown. I rose to leave as he rummaged in a drawer. At reception I said goodbye to the girl at the counter and heard a car backfire in the street. It actually sounded like it came from the psychiatrist's office behind me.

Back on the ship the captain looked inside the envelope then at me, quite sternly I thought.



He handed me the note from the psychiatrist